Sien Sappie ek speel nog die kitaar!!!

Me and Susan Bannister Dec 2007!!!!
We met in NZ about 2 years ago when working at the same company. Susan's also from SA and we have a ball here....

It is amazing how people's paths crosses and you don't realize why but one day it strikes you there was a reason to meet each other. We have been through sad times, happy times "a Little bit to much wine times" and it is all those times that makes a friendship grow stronger and then you are so addicted to the friendship you can hardly imagine your life without it...

don't know how did we ever survived without one another...








This is Me and my mum at the Xmas dooooo...

What an inspiration and support my mother is for me. Ever since I can remember she was there no matter how bad or sad..

I am blessed to share so many special moments with my mum...









This is Darnel (left) and you met Susan before... Darnel, Susan and me have been through difficult times together and she is another friend of mine that you at first don't realize what this friendship means to you until you are rock bottom and these people literally picks you up from the ground and make you feel like a million dollar after some guy just made you feel worth nothing. And then you realize one should not neglect your friends when you are happy and in love..
The 3 of us had been through some similar break ups and it is funny how there was always one strong one amongst us making turns to pick up the pieces.
Thank you my friends. Thank you for being my RIVA that God send my way. When I prayed and asked God how will I survive without Rive he send me these two angels. Even though I find it very hard still to live without Riva you guys did well.. If you meet Riva one day you will see it is hard to live up to her lol...





This us!!!!
This love is unbreakable......

Our friends increase the quality of our lives. Their presence causes our years to pass quickly and our days to be filled with meaning. The lengthen our days, improve our health and bring an enjoyment to our lives that we all need. Our friends remind us of what is special and lovable about us when the weariness of day - to - day existence has sometimes caused us to forget that something is.

MERRY XMAS!!!!

This is the 3 girls in my life... Merische (right) Philna (left) and Moemfie in the middle...

To all my friends and family that stood by me when I was so sad in SA, thank you for taking care of my kids when I was not in the position to do that myself. This is how big they are!!!

We love and miss you all VERY MUCH!!!!!!!!! xxxx

Chrismas is here!!! Dis kersfees!!!

To all my friends around the world. Hope you all have a wonderful xmas and enjoy the festive season. This is the time of year that you think about the good, bad and the ugly. Thinking of ways to improve as a person and the "how to make more money"

The past year have a lot of special memories for me. There is a lot of sad memories amongst them but they made me stronger. I want to share some of them with you...

Some of the highlights from 2007

Juan was born on 30/10/07. Babies is God's way of showing the world must go on...

I have met most amazing people in this year!!! You know who you are!!!

I have made contact with some of my old friends I have not spoken to in 11 years!!!

The most important part of 2007 is I have realized how strong I really am.

Some sad memories:

Me and Ross broke up 4/08/07.....

Two of my best friends broke up with their partners. One them had a miscarriage... Such a strong woman - you know who you are!! You are doing so good.. Without the 2 of you in my life I would be so lost!!!

I still miss RIVA VERY MUCH!!!!! It is almost 2 years since I last saw her and instead of improving I miss you every day more and more. You are my sister closest to my heart... We have been through so much.. Thank you for all the love you gave me when we were together still living off that love...

I found out one of my best friends died in a car crash!! Sonja Ek was so lief vir jou!!

This is what I mean!! I have two lovely daughters to show after a horrible marriage of 6 years...

Somedays I ask myself why did I ever stayed in a relationship like that and then I look at my girls and realize that is the reason...

I got married 30/10/1999 in Bloemfontein. The marriage did not last long... After 6 years we were divorced. I have my lovely 2 children to show though!! This is the only photo I have left of my wedding. So sad I always dream about my big day and the day was anything but happy!! And You only marry once for the first time....

This is my little one. Philna, was born on 13 Sept 2001 in Bloemfontein, the gynae had the dates wrong and she was born to early!! Her lungs were not fully developed and the worse fear of loosing my baby was facing me. She stayed in ICU for a month and 5 years later and you can see why I think she is my little angel... I must admit the older she get the angel side is fading.... lol!!!

This is me and Merische in South Africa 2006.

This was taken a week before we left for New Zealand when we left NZ I had two small girls - today when I look at them they are so grown up. We went through so much together..... There is no love like the love between a mother and her child.

This is me with some of the people I work for. I work there for 13 months. It was at first hard to get use to working with so many people and the language difference didnt help a lot!! But they learned to love me (I think they do) lol...

My Road to recovery!!

Every day is a battle. A battle to survive, to be the best mum and dad in the world, to give enough love. Some days I forgot to look at myself and be with myself. Then when I have a really bad day all the emotions just come tumbling down and you have to face all the heartache you tried to avoid for so long. I am trying to work out why people hurt the ones they love the most. If I can figure that one out I will be more than happy with myself.

Is it a human thing ?

I don't know!!! I just know that after my break up I will think twice before I do anything to anyone. People don't realize how bad their actions and words effect their loved ones. I lost the man I love to a one night stand?

How do you explain to yourself that you are not that bad? Why would he give up everything to be with you and then 18 months down the track he cheats on you with a girl he met in pub? And he blames it on the bottle of wine he had that night! He never even had a glass of wine with me!!
How do you look at yourself again and say " you are special!" ??? Impossible.
I think at this stage...

I know everyone says the problem is with him he needs to find himself and be happy with who he are etc. But I am human and my brain tells me the man you betrayed your love with a person that would sleep with a man she don't even know!!

I hope all my friends will realize what I am going through at this stage of my life. And for those who have been supporting me and THANK YOU!!!

This is to all my friends "You will know who you are"

Are you tired of those "sissy" Friendship poems that always sound good, but never actually come close to reality?
Well here is serier of promises that actually speak of true friendship.
You will see no cutesy little smiley faces on this card. Just the stone of cold truth of our great friendship.

1. When you are sad - I will help you get drunk and plot revenge against the bastard who made you sad.
2. When you are blue - I will try to dislodge whatever is choking you.
3. When you smile - I will know you got laid.
4. When you are scared - I will take the piss out of you about it, every chance I get.
5. When you are worried - I will tell you horrible stories about how much worse it could be until you quit whining.
6. When you are confused - I will use little words.
7. When you are sick - Stay away from me until you are well again. I don't want whatever you have.
8. When you fall - I will point and laugh at your clumsy ass.

This is my oath...... I pledge it to the end. "Why" you may ask; "Because you are my friend"

Hi to all my friends there in South Africa!!! I hope everyone is doing good and you enjoy the sunshine... For a change the sun is shining here too and it seems like the summer might be here!! It is now almost 4 months since me and Ross broke up. It is still hard for me. But I know it if for the best. I have met a lot of friends here that have been so good to me and my parents.
I will put a photo of Ross on here cause you have never even seen him!!!

This is philna at Foxton Beach Summer 2006 - What a happy child!! We could go to any beach or park with no fear the kids play wherever they want and they enjoy every moment of it. Ek sou nooit vir hulle dit kon gee wat ek nou vir hul gee nie. Dit maak my hart so seer om te sien hoe mykids grootword en al die mense wat vir my so baie beteken het toe ek alleen was mis dit... Maar weet elke keer wat ek in my kinders se laggende gesiggies vaskyk weet ek julle gun dit vir my..... Baie Dankie aan almal wat my bygestaan het toe ek plat was en sonder heenkome julle weet wie julle is.. Baie Dankie

This must of been a bitter pill for the kiwis... The day before the BID DAY World cup 2007 This was the photo on the front page of a KIWI newspaper... I dont have to say any more...

GO BOKKE!!!!!

This the newest addition to the family!! No he is not my cute little boy but my sister's baby. He is born on 30/10/2007 - his name is Juan... Just the smartest boy ever born..

After I did IFV with my ex partner (and failed at it 2) Juan have a very special place in my heart. After 7 years of not spending time with my family this is very special that I could be here when he was born

Hi Everyone
This is to let you know how my second chance for happiness is going. I will try to keep you updated as much as I can. To give you some background. I was married in October 1999, my first baby was born 11/05/00 Merische Louise Verhoef. My second baby born 13/09/01 Philna Christell Verhoef. I got divorced 28/04/05. Moved to NZ 28/02/06,